so doc I've been sick for a while now I
get all sorts of chest pain and fever
and running noses can you do anything
about
that uh KP and I have these weird dreams
that wake me up in the middle of the
night celesy knows I'm losing a lot of
sleep anyway KP I and then I get all
these weird stomach aches all the time
and I feel like I'm going to throw up at
random points of the day KP I am more
than willing to help you with any
troubles that may be on your mind but
you need to realize that I am not a
medical doctor just a psychologist I
cannot help you with the physical
symptoms of whatever ails you though I
can certainly recommend a few ponies and
perhaps even a zebra who can my
apologies oh right they really should
make that more clear in the advertising
campaigns well anyway I've gotten really
seriously sick for the first time in
life about early August of this year it
was one of the scariest experiences I
ever went through because For the first
time in my life I didn't feel like
myself I'm usually a relatively happy
person I keep myself to entertained and
have a fun time enjoying life but during
this period I felt like a part of myself
was missing I would get all these weird
symptoms like fevers and stomach pain my
parents didn't know what was wrong with
me at first they thought I was just
depressed or it was just nervous or
something like that but as time went on
and I showed no signs of improvement it
occurred to them that something more
serious was in the works so what did you
and your family do lots of doctors
medication and time was the biggest
Factor really I still don't feel 100%
but I'm getting better every day it's so
demanding and hard to have to Sly rely
on other people for everything to feel
like you're not complete or a whole
person I don't know maybe I'm just
rambling it's helpful to talk about
feelings of deep distress KP even if
there may not be an available answer it
is wonderful to hear that you're
recovering and I'm sure many of us are
more than willing to wait until you feel
ready to take part in YouTube again and
I can certainly relate to having so much
stress that you actually develop
physical ailments to go along with it I
can remember way back in mid 20104 when
my channel had been taken down without
warning and no immediate way of bringing
it back I felt devastated that
everything I had accomplished on YouTube
all the work I had put in over the
course of a year was just gone
forever for two whole days I was a shell
of my former self not knowing what to do
though I imagine things were a great
deal worse for you KP oh yes for months
I didn't feel like myself I could barely
function doing day-to-day activities and
always needed help to do what I needed
my parents were patient and took over my
normal responsibilities like driving
feeding me making sure I took my
medication but I was in a place I never
expected to be I think many people see
me as or let's say my internet Persona
as a bubbly fun fan girl and I forget
that life and events like this happen to
everyone I'm not as Invincible as I
thought I was I'm just a person and to
be living in a reality where nothing
seems to be improving where it's hard to
find happiness and you constantly feel
like you're going to get sick at any
moment was really hard for me to accept
I didn't understand it and why this
happened to me I kept on going back
trying to see if I'd done things a
certain way maybe I could have avoided
all this the other part of me tried to
find meaning in my experience at least
one good thing that came from all this
the light at the end of the tunnel is
something hard to see when someone goes
through something like this you know yes
I know trying to understand everything
about why we undergo a tremendous trial
can often just add to the despair
because we really can't see all ends in
life focusing on how much you could have
done things differently can help us to
grow but there really is so much we can
learn before that too will just add to
the despair in those moments of deep
sadness when all we can think to do is
question our very purpose in life there
is often a sincere desire to shut
yourself off from the world in the hopes
you will avoid any further trials and
begin to find some measure of clarity
this might help for a very short while
give you some time to reflect however I
would hope that you would not push away
those trustworthy individuals who
genuinely wish to see you recover simply
because you feel the need to be alone
even when our instincts tell us that we
need to do all in our power to stay in
that safe space until we can recover it
is important for us to remember even in
those moments of deepest despair that we
cannot grow as individuals if we refuse
to ever set foot outside of our comfort
zones ever again naturally I wouldn't
want you to get back to how things used
to be right from the start there are
good reasons as to why our instincts
tell us to find a safe space in the
first place after all but I would
encourage you to take a few baby steps
as it were working yourself towards a
goal outside of your comfort zone again
and if you're feeling afraid of
faltering running into unexpected
struggles along the way seek comfort
from those who have come before you
because no matter how dark and dreary
your circumstances may seem there's
always someone else you can learn from
and find confidence to follow in a
similar path and perhaps one day you too
can Inspire others to follow in your
path does any of this make sense to you
KP it's a lot to take in but yes it's
just when you feel things aren't getting
better any advice that comes seems to
fall in DEA ears not that it's not good
advice but it's hard to understand these
things when you're in such a bad place
both physically and mentally it was
honestly hard to find comfort in these
days you just feel so numb to the world
and nothing seems like it will get
better I guess my point is sometimes you
just got to keep on fighting and getting
through one day at a time because it
will get better even though it doesn't
seem like it it took me for example
months medication and a whole other
things just to feel like I had a bit of
myself back again but it happened it
just took time I suppose it's very much
like that old saying Time Heals all
wounds I don't know if I believe that
time can heal everything but there are
many cases where time is really the only
cure for what ails you so if we can
learn patience and persistence perhaps
even our darkest days can be
overcome I sincerely hope you will find
a way to lift your spirits again KP and
when you're ready become an even better
Pony than you've ever been
before until then my office is always
open as I'm sure many others out there
are willing to provide a listening year
should you have need of one talking
always does help lately I appreciate it
glad to be of service Miss possible take
care and have
[Laughter]
hope it's good to be
helping we'll be selling charity Merch
this convention season and not dish
t-shirts like before we have show
accurate plushies keychains necklaces
body pillows and ioc wait all going into
TRC or the trauma Recovery Center which
is a UK group that focuses on helping
children from abusive homes bullying and
a whole bunch of other issues get the
help they need more info on their
website so if you want to buy some stuff
please check out this tea public store
for new and old shirt designs we'll also
be doing convention store pickups if
you're going to any of these cons and
would like to pick up your order in
person you can fill up this form here
note that we only have some small KP
items at the actual conventions so we
might not have exactly what you want so
I recommend pre-ordering to make sure
that whatever you want is in stock and
all that good stuff and ready just for
you